BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
