Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
