I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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