Non-Jews are for practice
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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