Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Randomize