This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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