Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
God I need to hump something, right now.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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