thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize