im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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