You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
