she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize