grandma shit on top of the toilet
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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