I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
i've created a new STD.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize