you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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