with your own penis?
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize