I think my fart just growled at me.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Randomize
