There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
