Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize