Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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