Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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