and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
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