We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
