Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning

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(901): View more from Tennessee

Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis

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(203): View more from Connecticut

she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.

(860): View more from Connecticut

what did you do?

(203): View more from Connecticut

i asked her out. that's so hot.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

I know she was great

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(480): View more from Arizona

He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.

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(925): View more from California

I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.

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(913): View more from Kansas

You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.

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(619): View more from California

Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.

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