That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Randomize
