dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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