I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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