She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
