I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Randomize
