shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
