writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
