i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize