does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
The uberlube is also flammable
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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