What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Randomize