Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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