I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Text me some of your sweat
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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