College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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