sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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