end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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