you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Randomize