Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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