so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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