So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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