Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Randomize
