they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
