I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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