Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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