I got chris browned last night
I just made out with a guy for $7.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
