its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
