I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
