Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
