I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize