Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
